50 reasons to be thin ....

REASONS TO BE THIN


1. So that you can try on clothes without wanting to stay in the fitting room, curl up into a ball, and die.

2. So that every and any photograph taken of you from any angle will look good.

3. So that you won’t be the fattest girl out of all your friends.

4. So that boys will think of you as girlfriend potential, not that funny girl who’s kind of chubby.

5. So that all your old expensive clothes fit again

6. So that you’re cheek bones will resurface

7. Because skinny girls can get away with, making any face, wearing any outfit, or having any hairstyle

8. So that you don’t look like a messy slob with no self control

9. So that you’re friends respect you for something other than the fat, funny, goofy grandma who couldn’t possibly be their competition

10. So that you’re arm flab doesn’t spread out when you rest your arms on your side

11. So that pool parties aren’t a horrific nerve racking occasion, where you are constantly toting around a towel, but everyone knows what you’re covering

12. So your giant jiggling pockets of sagging fat that you call your breasts dissolve

13. So that people whisper about how skinny you’ve gotten behind your back

14. So that you when you sit, no matter what you’re wearing your stomach remains one flat perfect board

15. So that you never have to worry about your disgusting love handles oozing over the edges of your too-tight pants

16. So that you can rush out of the house in jeans and a t-shirt and look like a model

17. So that you don’t look like a fat little kid anymore.

18. So that you make your parents proud instead of being their fat-ass daughter without any self control

19. so that you’re boyfriend will be proud to show your photo, or you off to his friends

20. So that you can wake up in the morning without trying on a million and a half outfits and looking fat in each one

21. So that when someone asks “Who’s insert your name here?” The answer is “That really skinny chick.”

22. So that your self control, your amazing discipline shines through for everyone to see.

23. So that when you’re drunk at a party you don’t have to worry about your shirt riding up and everyone being exposed to your disgusting fat rolls.

24. So that there is a space between your legs.

25. So that the shorter the shorts, the better.

26. So that you’ll be referred to as the pretty one

27. So that he(or she) can hoist you over their shoulders with ease

28. So that he can tickle you without you feeling like he’s fondling your rolls.

29. So that your collar bones could poke an eye out

30. So that you’re hip bones will hurt people when you hug them

31. So that your stomach goes straight from stomach to bikini area, no little fat protrusion at the bottom in between

32. So that no matter what angle, or how hard you try it is physically impossible for you to have more than one chin

33. So that your shoulder blades are literally blades

34. So that your ribs are always showing, not just when you stretch

35. So that nobody even remembers that girl you used to be

36. So that you’re delicate and graceful

37. So that anybody who’s ever teased you, called you fat, called you ugly, called you a bitch will see you and think how they were so wrong.

38. So that he, the boy who broke your heart, will look at you now and think “wow I made a mistake”

39. So that when people do see you eat they will not be thinking, “put down the fork fat ass”

40. so that your animal counterpart will be a gazelle, not a cow.

41. to prove yourself, to rub it in all their faces

42. so that when you try on your friends clothes they’re too big

43. so that being how ever weird crazy or out there you are is acceptable because you’ll look good doing it

44. so that if god forbid someone finds out that you’re starving yourself they don’t say “really? But you don’t look anorexic”

45. Because who wants a fat daughter, best friend, or girlfriend

46. so that you’re better than her

47. so that everything is finally perfect

48. or so that at least you’re perfect when nothing else is

49. So you’ll be that girl.

50. Because EVERYTHING, I mean every single thing about your life will be better when you are finally finally skinny.